Melissa Marsh

 

"When I was in High School I wanted to become the President of the United States - so I applied to the Universities that had the best American Studies and Political Science Programs. When I wrote to Columbia University for an application, they sent both an application for Columbia and for Barnard College.  Even though my grandmother had gone to Smith College, I had no intention of going to an all woman's college.  I didn't think having a four year break from competing with men would be beneficial for my career. But when I applied and ultimately accepted a spot at Barnard, I had no idea that it was a woman's college.  It's amazing that it happened this way, but I am so proud to have gone to a woman's college."  Melissa is the founder of PLASTARC and is an expert in workplace strategy.  "In the end, I decided that through Architecture and occupant advocacy I could start/make change faster than if  I were President. I may or may not be right."

Enslow Kable

"The ability to be a leader has little to do with how many hours you are in the office and more to do with your innate leadership qualities. When I had my second child I chose to work a four day week. I'm in advertising and taking that one day off held me back, my career stagnated. The silver lining is that my career has progressed and I just started at a new firm so that I can have more flexibility.  My work week is different and I never have a full day off, but I can sit here and have a cup of coffee because I work from home and work all over the city. Today I can pick up my daughter and take her dance class.  Next week I am going on a school field trip, I haven't done that in years.  If I were a man I wouldn't have wanted to have a four day work week,  I have never come across a man who wants or requests a shortened work work."

Ngozi Okoro

"I know what it's like to always walk into a classroom and be the only woman and the only woman of color." Ngozi is a civil engineer and started her company Fitwork.co to empower networking among women. "I have a unique perspective.  I know if I hadn't been the only woman, the only black woman walking into those rooms wouldn't have impacted me the same way.  I'm glad I had that experience - it gave me direction and inspired me to create my own company."

Shelly Ratigan

“It is much harder to be a man, they are under much more pressure to perform.  Not having all that pressure makes it easier for women to believe in themselves. Women aren’t expected to have accomplishments – it somehow seems to come as a surprise when a woman does have accomplishments, but that is expected of a man.” Shelly is an entrepreneur and the owner of Taos Northside Health and Fitness in Taos, New Mexico. “Women are born with leadership qualities. Some people say that is because women are often mothers. I don’t think that is true. I didn’t become a mother for a long time and I had these skills. It would be wonderful if women could recognize their leadership skills from the beginning.”

Jeana Bentley

“I had a seasonal job selling firearms and I just fell in love with them. After a while I wanted to be more hands-on with firearms so I joined the Airforce.” Jeana is an Airman in the United States Airforce and thinks the hardest part of being a woman is that people underestimate her. She is the youngest child in her family and also the only female. “Being a woman in a home full of men had its challenges but it taught me to be strong. My father served in the Navy during Vietnam. When I first enlisted he thought that the military was not a good place for women. But now that he sees me in the Airforce, he has changed his mind.”

Ruth Lemansky

“Nursing has been so natural for me because it incorporates so many female characteristics and I get to bring my womanly nature into my work. It makes caring for my patients fun, like I am spending time with a friend and not at work.” Ruth is a single mother and a nurse practitioner at  El Centro Family Health in Embudo, New Mexico.  "I’m allowed to bring my emotions to work, its acceptable. I can coo over my patients but because I am a woman it isn’t seen as creepy.”

Claire Rowell

"There were socially accepted topics of conversation in my home and money wasn't one of them. I never learned the vocabulary for asking for more, asking for a raise, using my connection to network and advance my career. I don't think men question money or networking the same way.  My grandmother taught me to never overstay your welcome and to not be an imposition."  Claire Rowell is a workplace anthropologist with PLASTARC, where she says her boss, Melissa Marsh, is a true role model. "It is inspiring to see Melissa's command over a meeting.  She is confident and capable and often she is the only woman in the room. A lot of my friend's mothers are like this too and I admire them.  They are strong women and their example is trickling down to their daughters. I am not yet equipped with all of these traits and skills but I hope to be in the very near future."

Catherine Lennon

 

"I was raised in the 1950's when women could become nurses, teachers or social workers," laughed Catherine Lennon, " I was lucky I had very good parents and they sent me to college at St.Rose in Albany.  We were called the "Golden Rose Buds" and this year is our 50th reunion."  Catherine became a social worker and worked for Catholic Charity who then gave her a full scholarship to Fordham to earn her MSW.  "I worked in the government for the Health Department and I retired and now I get a huge pension," she said smiling. At that time there weren't many women working with her and her male bosses would say things like "Well, you might not be here in a few years," implying that young women would get married and leave their jobs to become housewives.  Catherine never did get married and never had children. "Single men are called swinging singles but a unmarried women is an old maid or it is assumed that you have some sort of defect that makes you unwanted," she explained.  "One of my best supervisors was gay and when she got in a fight with her partner, she moved in with me.  There was a lot of sniggering at work. People make a lot of assumptions when you aren't married," she explained.  "It really kills me to see Hillary using the woman card, because it's phoney. You have to vote for who you want to vote for, not vote for someone because they are a woman," she said.

Alya Almuzaini

"An empowered woman empowers society. It is a big responsibility being a woman and being a mother. Women need to be supported with their children, with their family and with their work. Before all the diplomats were men.  Then there were female diplomats but until 2002 female diplomats from Kuwait were not places in international roles. A woman may face injustice at any stage of life. And we need to promote our rights more than men have too.  I am proud that I am a woman and even prouder that I have reached my goals despite gender challenges."  Alya is the 8th female diplomat from Kuwait that has been sent to another country and has been working at the United Nations headquarters since 2011 and will return to Kuwait this summer. She is also the mother of four children.

Mary

Mary was sitting on a bench in Stuyvesant Town and I saw her beautiful  blue eyes flash in the sunlight and I stopped to photograph her. "I was Special Ed teacher in Brooklyn at P.S. 10 for more than twenty years. I loved it," explained Mary. One of Mary's daughters is also a teacher and ironically works at the same school in Brooklyn where Mary worked. She is a mother to four children and a grandmother to five children who all live in Peter Cooper Village Stuyvesant Town. " I was raised in Queens but my husband was from Manhattan and we moved into Stuyvesant over forty years ago and just stayed, " she said. While interviewing Mary several  people passed and waved to her and I got the sense that Mary has a big community of friends here.  One of Mary's daughters is also a teacher and ironically works at the same school in Brooklyn where Mary worked. " I get to see my kids and grandchildren but not as often as I'd like.  They are in school and working and busy. But, I get to spend a lot of time with them in the summer at my beach house in Springlake," she said.

Emily Boggs

"Every woman I know has some creepy or uncomfortable story about a man harassing her.  It happens all the time, it's commonplace, almost like it is ok to do that. It's not ok." - Emily Boggs is a student in NYC.

Marvell Robinson

I met Marvell in the L train subway station on First Avenue. She and her two daughters were selling bags of cookies. " We are a start up," she explained. "I started by just packaging other people's products but now we are baking all kinds of things. Natural cookies, from plant-based ingredients." she said. Marvell's daughters are home schooled and after they finish schooling at three, they help her with the business. " My mom wasn't a business minded woman nor did she have any have inspirations of starting her own business, she was more of a home maker just taking care of the family. I want to instill in my young ladies ideas and ideals, I wasn't  privileged to have learned from my mom about creativity and innovation or how to make a living by doing the things you enjoy and love." She says that sometimes you learn things too late in life. She wants her girls to be prepared, to learn when they are young. Marvell is glad she is a woman, she says it is special and she likes being feminine. "I don't think that I have to walk or talk or act like a man to succeed, I can be feminine, I can be a woman." What she doesn't like about a being a woman is the way women treat one another. She clarified, "I don't like social media because women use it to criticize and cut down one another. They will look you over head to toe and comment on social media and then won't even say hello when they see you in person."

Xiao Jing Xu

Jing and her husband have owned Crystal Cleaners and Laundromat on East 20th Street for eight years. "Because I am a woman I am very luck to have babies. I have two happy and smart daughters," said Jing.  "I think maybe in the work world and at school it may be easier to be a woman, but at home it is harder.  We have to take care of the home, the food, the children," she said.  For Jing it doesn't matter that she didn't have any sons.  "In Chinese culture having boys is more celebrated. I am happy that I have two girls but maybe for my family, they would have been happier if I had a son," she said.

Luisa Orozco

 

Luisa has been working at Rent The Runway for the past two years and she aspires to do something more intellectual in the fashion industry.  "I want to do something where I make a difference in the world. The fashion world is disillusioning - I want to make clothing more meaningful, more intellectual and less about having something."  She pointed out that sometimes it sucks to be a woman.  "I am into politics. And there are huge inequalities between men and women. Even in fashion - everything costs more for women. It sucks.  A lot of things suck about the inequalities between men and women and they go unnoticed or even if they are noticed nobody does anything about them," she said.  She is Columbian and though she is an American citizen, when she travels alone to Columbia she has a hard time getting through security without a hassle. "It's like it is looked down upon to be a woman traveling by yourself. I was recently going to Columbia and there were all these other men traveling alone too, but when I put my passport or ID through the scanner I always get an X and have to go through further security scrutiny.  I have to wonder if it is because I am a woman, none of those other men traveling alone who are in the same line get an X."

Bamike Ogunrinu

 

"I like to make women feel beautiful," said Bamike. She has been a make-up artist for three years at Sephora.  And she is the first person I have seen who looked great with purple lipstick.  When I photograph someone by the second frame,  I can if they have been a model - and Bamike had been.  "I loved being on the runway, I get such a thrill out of the excitement and the power of being in front of all those people. I was cheerleader all through school.  I would perform in stadiums in front of 5,000 people. I miss that."  I asked her, like I ask all EVE's, how she felt about being a woman. And she confidently stated, "I wouldn't switch genders for anything. There is power in being a woman that if I were a man I wouldn't feel. We are the stronger gender."  Bamike works full time at Sephora and she is studying Biology and she plans to study veterinary science at Cornell University.

Ana Torres

After finishing up a photo shoot in the Bronx River Park I was making my way to the subway when I saw a woman selling water at the intersection.  Smart idea.  It was hot and humid and I stopped to buy a bottle.  And then like always, out came the story and out came my camera.

I had to ask if she was really making any money sitting there in the sweltering heat.  Turns out, she can make between $200-600 depending on the day and I guess the temperature.  "I only do this in the summer. I'm a teacher during the school year. " (sad side note here:  I am fairly certain she is making more money per hour selling water than most teachers earn during the school year.)  And being a single mother with four children she needs a summer job.

At 12 Ana was pregnant. Spoiler alert!  There is a happy ending.

She needed an escape, her father was an alcoholic and her older brother's beat her and her safety net from the beatings was a boyfriend.  His grandmother lived in an apartment downstairs and she spent a lot of time there." When my mother found out I was pregnant, she threatened my life" recalled Ana, "And she refused to let me have an abortion - and I would have."  Her daughter is now 21.  "I kept going to school even while I was pregnant. There was a daycare at my high school, but after a while I couldn't take it so I quit."  Ana got a job at McDonald's and her GED through associates.

This is a list of jobs that she has had; McDonald's, Volunteer office at Jacobe, Patient relations at North Central Hospital, Jeans Plus, Intern at the career services at Monroe College, Hospitality at Monroe College, medical billing at an Optometrist's office. Six years after she had her first child she had another. But as Ana puts it "I pulled through."  While working all those jobs and raising two children, Ana got a bachelor's degree in Business.  And then, while working as a dialysis technician she completed her Masters in Education.  She teaches 2nd grade at ICAR charter school and is a TA for ELA to help mediate reading.   "I know," she said, "I beat the statistics."

Victoria Bekerman

 

"I used to work at a Law firm but I found it boring,  so I took courses at FIT and became a jeweler," says Bekerman while standing beside her Grand Central Station pop-up booth.  I asked Victoria the same question I ask all of the "Eves" I meet. "How would your life have been different if you weren't a woman?" She admitted that when she was growing up she wanted to be a boy.  "They have more opportunities to be successful and that they seem to be more athletic and more focused."  And then she explained that as she got older she realized, "Being a woman means that I have more layers. I see things that guys don't see. I can see other sides to a situation."  And then she got that far away look in her eyes and said, "The most amazing thing about being a woman is being able to give birth.  After my daughter was born I realized that I would much rather be a woman."  Then she laughed.  "But," she said, "There are no priorities given to pregnant women in the United States. I'm from Argentina and there people will give you priority in line or for a seat.  Here in the U.S., not so much."

She makes great jewelry, I bought a friend of mine one of her bracelets and she wears it all the time. VictoriaBekerman.com

Dominga Castro Lucas

When Dominga was 18 she and her boyfriend were both studying to become teachers.  Her boyfriend became a teacher while Dominga became pregnant. In the Highlands of Guatemala when a woman becomes pregnant her education is over, if it wasn't over already.

I met Dominga in 1993 she was nearly 20 years old and I was a 25 year old Peace Corps Volunteer.   She was vibrant, smart, funny and beautiful.  She taught me how to speak a few words in Mam and how to bathe in a Chuj (a sweat lodge used for weekly bathing).  I taught her how to make apple pie. I urged her to go back to school, that is wasn't too late. And then two years later, my stint in the Peace Corps was over and we returned to the United States and Dominga was pregnant again.

Then in 1999, I sat in her one room house that had plastic for windows and talked about life while she nursed her third baby. Her husband was drinking and beating her and she needed help. She had never asked me for money before, but that day she asked for $100 so she could buy a propane stove.  I thought, "How is a stove going to help?"

In March I returned to Guatemala.  Dominga's mother-in-law told us she was at the elementary school.  I found her in an office, her office.  Dominga was now the Director of the elementary school.

With $100 Dominga bought a stove and cooked faster in the morning and then could heat up the food in the evening. This gave  her the time to go to school in the afternoons. When she graduated the government assigned her to a school that took hours to walk to. Her second year she protested. She  insisted that a mother of 4 children  should be able to teach closer to home.  She got a position teaching in the school closest to her home and after 8 years of teaching she became the director of a brand new school even closer to her house.

She said she went back to school because  I encouraged her and that kept her going. I asked her, "Why did you listen to me?"  She said, "Because you were the only one who believed in me.  You were the only one who acknowledged that I could learn more, do more and reach my goals."

Dominga knew what she needed - a propane stove to free her from the long hours of cooking over a wood stove and an open fire.  There is of course the saying, "Give a man a fish and he eats for one day. Teach a man to fish and he is set for life."  I think there should be a different saying for women. "Listen to a woman and give her what she needs and then stand back and watch it happen."